November 2008 Reflection

As I sit in front of my four foot tall Christmas tree, complete with white lights, light gray pearls and a silver star, I reflect on my experiences, both here in the Emerald Isle and abroad. It has been nearly three months since I called Mary Lou Hartman from Chicago to tell her how elated I was to leave the United States for the first time. I will never forget her parting words, “Remember, make the most of this opportunity. I know that you will.” Immediately after our conversation, I removed my new digital camera from its purse and began to take pictures in the O’Hare airport. Observers looked towards me as if I was a foreigner in my home country. But I wanted to document everything and uphold my pledge to Mary Lou. I also began to talk to fellow passengers who would be departing on the same seven-hour flight to London. I quickly learned that most were Americans revisiting London for business or leisure. I had initially planned to see the city of London in October, considering that, for now, Belfast was my final destination. However, during the flight, my recent tonsillectomy introduced severe pain and eventually vomiting. I hid my camera in my carry-on bag, as this was one experience that I didn’t care to record or remember.

With an upset stomach and sore throat, I was certainly not in the mood to be the gregarious Southerner. Usually, I introduce myself to others first. But, this time, a kind gentleman sitting next to me stole my role. He assisted me and happened to be a citizen of Belfast. Perhaps it was his strong accent or comforting words, but I immediately began to feel better. After my fifth and final trip to the airplane lavatory, I think Paul realized that I was not in a physical condition to discuss Magner’s cider or fish and chips. But he did continue to tell me a lot about the place that I now call “home.” He discussed the religious divide I couldn’t ignore, the pubs I should eventually visit, and the people who have ultimately become my extended family.

As expected, I remained in London with friends to recuperate from my unfortunate first flight over the Atlantic. Four days and a few painkillers later, I decided to do what I do best: spend money. With part of the generous travel stipend from the Mitchell Scholarship, I toured the Cabinet War Rooms, visited Buckingham Palace, and saw “Wicked.” After two weeks of traveling through Southampton, Salisbury and Manchester, I finally boarded an Aer Lingus flight to Belfast. Once I arrived at the Belfast International Airport, I continued to take pictures of my new surroundings. But these digitally enhanced photos were unlike the others in that these were of a place I now affectionately refer to as “home.”

Over the past three months, I have upheld my vow to Mary Lou to “make the most of the opportunity” and have experienced, first hand, Paul’s description of Belfast. Through my weekly visits to a local church, a black cab tour of the political murals, and conversations with Irish and Northern Irish graduate students, I now understand how extensively religion and politics have interacted with one another on the Island. However, I see the relationship most intensely in my modules: Human Rights Law I and Equality and Law. Within these classes, I am constantly introduced to regional law cases where human rights violations on the grounds of “religion” or “political opinion” are not beyond the scope of possibilities. I have also studied several of these cases through my recent internship placement at the Equality Commission of Northern Ireland.

It is interesting that sometime over the past week, I have noticed myself saying “we” in reference to the Equality Commission. Through researching various aspects of discrimination and engaging with barristers and solicitors who practice public interest law, I am quickly beginning to feel part of the Commission’s daily rhythm and to sense the passion with which I am surrounded. I am infused by the staff of the Commission with a commitment to empowering all those who do not fully understand the protections afforded them by international law. It is this same passion that has caused me to become actively involved in the local gay, lesbian, bisexual and trans gender (GLBT) political community. But my studies at Queen’s and my internship at the Equality Commission have helped to ground me and refocus my purpose in life to something beyond the immediate experience. They have transformed me into a passionate advocate for all who are victims of discrimination. But it is the Mitchell Scholarship Program that has provided me with the opportunity to connect with professionals who share my vision.

During my most recent trip to Dublin, I met with Irish Senator David Norris. Senator Norris was elected to the Irish Senate during a time of uncertainty and fear in the GLBT community. As the first openly gay person elected to public office in Ireland, Norris founded the Campaign for Homosexual Law Reform. As early as 1983, he led a campaign for the decriminalization of homosexual acts. During lunch, he explained to me that, although the Supreme Court of Ireland ruled against him in a 3-2 decision, he had certainly made a difference and encouraged discourse on the rights of gays and lesbians. Most importantly, the Senator did not act for any immediate reward. Rather, he acted to assure all Irish citizens, both gay and straight, that they would be given the opportunity to express their differences in a safe atmosphere.

My day with Senator Norris and my studies at Queen’s University are coupled with other recent experiences that have undoubtedly shaped my perception of the world and further enhanced my tenure as a Mitchell Scholar. With increasing global interdependence, it is imperative that I have an international sensitivity and openness that can only come from having pursued opportunities, both academic and non-academic, to interact with other cultures and peoples. As a result, I have already spent one-third of my travel bursary to travel to mainland Europe for the first time. In two months, I have seen the Louvre in Paris, the Globe Theater in London, and an opera in Barcelona. I have also traveled throughout both the Republic of Ireland and Northern Ireland. As a member of a local skydiving club, I have seen a unique view of this magnificent island.

Looking around my room decorated with postcards from all over Ireland, my impending coursework, and three personalized post-it notes from fellow scholars, I understand that each of these experiences would be impossible without the financial, professional and emotional support from Mary Lou, Trina and all of the members of the U.S.-Ireland Alliance. These confirmations are evidence of an incredible three months on this Island: striking and nostalgic as they may be, whether viewed individually or taken as a whole, they embody the spirit and the purpose behind the George J. Mitchell scholarship program.

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November 2008 Reflection

I came to Ireland to challenge myself in ways that I have not had the time to since I was a kid. I have spent so many years living an intensely scheduled life, driving from piano to soccer, running from debate society to community service, student government to crew. I look at my schedule from last year and I see an obsessively color-coded paint-by-number drawing, depicting a life of constant motion. That life eventually led to an accidental severe dehydration that put me in the hospital with a new perspective. For the first time in a while I questioned what I was doing. Questions like “how will I fit in all of these tasks into my day?” and “what needs to be accomplished?” had been answered constantly. Now, I began to examine questions long unconsidered like “why do I spend my life this way?” and “what should I be doing?” Not having a sense of philosophy or even broad spirituality was no longer acceptable to me. As I approached “real life,” I wanted to understand these questions before continuing.

My mind immediately went to the process necessary: “how can I accomplish this task?” I study neuroscience, so it derived a neuroscience answer: find views and experiences that challenge my own, and take time to understand them. When under stress and time constraints, people tend to choose environments and information sources that make them feel comfortable, and that confirm their own views, the confirmation bas in action. Americans read American news, while dualist philosophers read dualist critiques of the outside world. The path of least resistance is to remain within our own views. When you’re living a hyper-scheduled life, that’s all that there is time to do. Before returning to “real life,” I hope to challenge as many of my core beliefs as possible while I still have time to do so. That means going to see Beckett’s play, “Happy Days” at the Abbey Theater, and catching a glimpse of the middle age experience that I won’t understand until I reach it. That means traveling to Belfast, Cork, Galway, Limerick, and across Dublin to hear ballads that talk of different interpretations of the times of yore. It means looking at Viennese actionist’s self-mutilation recorded as art, or seeing the Vienna Boys’ Choir in the National Concert Hall. Or, traveling to Morocco to glimpse a slice of Arab culture. Visiting Oktoberfest, Berlin, and London bookended by the Ryanair advertising of “Buy 1, Get 1 Free.” It’s about taking the time to sit down for coffee with someone of a different viewpoint. It’s about reading the book cursorily mentioned in class that seems fascinating, but is forgotten two days later in the whirlwind of activity. It’s about appreciating sitting and reflecting.

It’s about being lucky enough to have the luxury of taking the time to challenge your views from all angles, and ask the “whys” of life. So, that’s why I’m here in Ireland. The answers to my questions are still opaque. Maybe the Djemaa el-Fnaa, (an ancient marketplace in Marrakesh, where I am writing this journal) or quantum theories of consciousness will be the key.

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November 2008 Reflection

“I wish I could live life in horizontal,” I moaned to Erin Rhoda, a fellow Mitchell, while lying in bed with a stomach bacterial infection that seemed to have a keen sense of direction. Over my three days in bed, I tried many things to keep myself entertained in this horizontal bliss: reading, detailing a “When I Get Better” to-do list (without a pen and paper…a disaster), counting the number of columns on my radiator, trying to find the perfect word to describe the color of my walls, making up scenarios for the drunken screams right below my window, playing the “Is that Indigestion or Do I Need to Vomit?” game… As you can see, the past seventy-two hours have been action-packed and thrilling!

Needless to say, life in horizontal has been drab inside my apartment room, despite its spacious comfort and lovely views of Trinity. But it has given me time to think – a dangerous thing, some would say!

I came to Ireland with no expectations. Culture books can only capture a fraction of the truth of a place. Regardless of what I read, however, I was convinced that this country, which, to me, represented a new beginning and new stage in my life, would be nothing short of wonderful. And I’m glad to write that the one expectation I had has been met – brilliantly.

First, let’s start with the Mitchell group: the most caring, unique, and incredibly accomplished group of men and women I’ve ever had the honor of meeting and forming friendships with. In a short amount of time, we’ve created a bond that extends from drinks at the pub to girls’ weekends in Wexford to maintaining a support system for any matter. Adam and I have supported each other’s labors through National Science Foundation grant writing for our PhDs; many a great conversation about the Indiana capital punishment system has been shared between Andrea and me. Vicki, our Naval Academy graduate, has given me a perspective on the US election that I never would have considered: “Whom would you elect as your next boss?” And who would have thought that just 9 weeks after meeting Erin, she’d insist on cleaning up the stomach flu vomit from my bathroom because I was too weak to wipe it up myself? That’s not just friendship – that’s the Mitchell bond.

And let’s not forget about my classmates in the M.Sc. Environmental Sciences program. On the first day of class, I met eleven new classmates who would eventually become another great support system and a consortium of craic-finders here at Trinity. Waking up for 9 am chemical analysis class is just a bit easier because I know Barrie will be there cracking jokes about …well, everything, and Aoife and Cathy will be the voices of reason in the back corner when the lecture seems to be going off track. Lorraine will always accompany you to the Java City when you’re in the mood for a mocha and Irene, our physicist, will ask the lecturer the question that everyone has on their minds. We’ve been literally knee deep in Tolka Estuary mud, sorted through samples that smelled like rotten eggs, stayed in the labs long hours measuring milligrams of this and moles of that, and because of it, we’ve celebrated together every Friday after a big project is due. It’s my other family here in Ireland, and I’ve been so thrilled that they’ve taught me the lingo and accepted me as a friend who just happens to be from America.

Not everything got off to a great start here, though, and I’m happy to say that it was nearly unavoidable, so please don’t look into this trying to place blame. The Mitchells had arrived back at their universities after our orientation weekend, and in our exhausted states, Erin and I quickly decided that going to bed early was the best option. However, nearly two minutes after we said our ‘good night’ to each other, I politely banged on Erin’s door to show her what I just discovered all over my body: over 200 mosquito-like bites. When she opened the door, she went into “Mom Mode” (as I call it) and searched through her medicine bag for anything to soothe the itchiness (she’s been to Ghana…of course she had some remedy for this!). We tried to think of explanations: allergic reaction? mosquitoes? bed bugs? I’m sure you’re thinking: “Bed bugs! Aren’t those a thing of the past?” Unfortunately, due to the increase in travel throughout the world, the frequency of bed bug incidents are on the rise. But, no fear: only about 50% of people who are bitten actually show signs, making these bugs difficult to track and exterminate. If you have sensitive skin like me, the chances of showing off your glamorous bites are pretty good.

I slept on the other bed in my room, which Lara Janson, another Mitchell, had slept on just prior to our Mitchell orientation. (Unfortunately, Lara called me days later explaining the same symptoms to me; she, too, had been consumed by my room’s bed bugs!) Nothing could be done until the morning when the Accommodations Office was open. However, when I strolled in at 9 am showing off my bites, immediate action was taken. I said good-bye to my belongings which would be stored at -40ºC for 48 hours. I then said hello to €300 to purchase new clothes and toiletries for the next three days. My room was quarantined and I was moved to a different dorm for a week. My saving grace was prescription-only antihistamine tablets (probably made for horses because of their incredible size); these turned me into a normal person who happened to have 200 bites all over her body that were more potent than mosquito bites. During this time, I was even asked out on a date by a very handsome Irish ambulance driver, so maybe bed bugs can work for you too!

Since I’ve been here, pleasure reading has been a constant companion to my studies. I just finished Alice Sebold’s Lucky, as well as David Sedaris’s Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim. Both have become instant favorites, obviously for very different reasons, given their content. I’ve also had the pleasure of babysitting three lovely girls of one of our benefactors, Lawrence Flavin, formerly of Quinlan Private. When I was putting them to bed, they were asking me about the stock market crash in America; I told the girls that I certainly wished the American economic situation was a fairytale. But, as Erin would describe him, our beacon of light and hope for the future has come – Barack Obama. The Mitchells and our guests had the privilege of attending the US Embassy Election Night party at the Guinness Storehouse. I’m not sure I want to see Wolf Blizter’s face at 100x magnification again on a big screen, but the excitement in the Storehouse was palpable…as confirmed by the incredible amount of lager that was consumed that night.

What’s my favorite thing about Ireland? It’s not the cobblestones, or the buildings, or the accents (although these all are close seconds). Ireland is its people, and they’re lovely, and warm, and welcoming (except at the bank during lunch hour). And to appreciate this isle, I can’t live life horizontally, which means I’ve got to kick this stomach flu to the curb and get back to being vertical…it’s the only way Dublin operates!

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June 2008 Reflection

There is a cozy old pub on Poolbeg Street and my older sister and I are sitting in it, Smithwick’s in front of us, chatting and reminscing as we drink. The ornery old publican is pacing up and down the length of the bar, filling pint glasses as he shares rather raunchy jokes with the regulars (similarly old and ornery looking men) and commenting on us, the out-of-place American ‘tourists’. I live here, I proudly tell him. And so, after yet another dirty joke, he shares some wise words. There are different kinds of experiences, he says. There are things you do that you’d rather you hadn’t, things you do you’d rather forget, things you do that you sometimes recall, and things you do that you fondly remember. But above all else, there are things you do that you take a few minutes to appreciate every day. Make your time in Ireland one of those kinds of experiences, he tells me.

For the rest of my life, I will appreciate my experience as a Mitchell Scholar every day and for this, I am eternally grateful to not just the US-Ireland Alliance, Trina, and Mary Lou, but to the donors and sponsors who have made this programme possible; to the spunky professors who opened their office doors and defied my expectations; to the other Scholars who provided loads of hilarious moments (including attempting to bring in extra guests to Trinity’s campus by “bribing” the Trinity security guards with pumpkin pie) and political debates; and to the staff at Dublin’s Homeless Agency, the site of my current internship.

My full-time work as a policy intern with the Homeless Agency has done much more than integrate classroom theory with the real world. It has fostered my sense of civic responsibility, allowed me to bond over after-work drinks with Irish co-workers, provided insight into the Irish policymaking and budgetary processes, and, perhaps most importantly, taught me that while Irish policymaking may differ from the American process, there are fundamental realities in tackling omnipresent societal challenges.

My definition of a healthy community encompasses much more than the physical health of its residents to include issues of education, housing, and economic and social justice. I have found that the services that governments and nonprofit organisations provide to achieve community health are quite similar, whether I’m in the sprawling, cosmopolitan metropolis of Dublin or in the small, college town of Carlisle, Pennsylvania.

In both of these locations, social services agencies attempt to better serve their respective communities by building coalitions. Collectives form to overcome limitations that individual organizations do not have the capacity to independently address. From my experiences on both sides of the Atlantic, I have developed an understanding of the difficulties in achieving interagency collaboration between nonprofit organizations serving overlapping populations. Thus the challenge of bringing organisations together has become a topic of deep interest to me. Achieving collaboration when individual, autonomous organizations each have an allegiance to their own missions, stakeholders, and constituencies is not an easy task. Nevertheless, I continue to believe building coalitions, especially those based on information exchange, may be one way to maintain and increase the overall health of communities. I remain a bit uncertain about where I will be working and living when I leave Dublin in mid-September, but I do know that I will continue to be committed to serving my community, to helping my place of work achieve its organisational mission and objectives, and to making people, particularly those most vulnerable in society, more healthy. And I know that, like my publican friend advised me, I will be sure to appreciate my Irish experiences on a daily basis.

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June 2008 Reflection

I’ve always possessed a character trait that I consider both a blessing and a curse: I hate to be alone. My dad has it too, so I get it honest. I derive my energy from interpersonal interaction, and after a day by myself, I am irritable, depressing, and moping around like a wilted flower. Because of this, and given enough time on my own, I will attempt to befriend anyone and everyone, for better or worse. On good days, this leads to making a new acquaintance or even a close friend, and on the worst days, I can be a huge annoyance to someone just trying to have a quiet walk to class, train ride, etc. You know those people you sit next to on planes that just won’t stop trying to make conversation and let you go to sleep? Yep, that’s me.

Fortunately, this trait of mine has been generally well received during my year in Ireland. From the first day I arrived and pulled out a map on the streets of Dublin, and an old Irish gentleman stopped me with all of my bags and asked if I needed help, I knew I was in for a pleasant year. After countless conversations on trains and in taxis, it’s seems that I’ve found a kindred spirit in the culture here. I couldn’t have asked for nicer housemates, and I even asked one of my Irish roommates, Aoife, to be a bridesmaid in my upcoming wedding in August. Our house has enjoyed countless spontaneous movie nights, and we’ve even thrown the occasional “official” party for ourselves to commemorate birthdays, homecomings, holidays (the piÒata of a baby chicken with a leprechaun hat affixed to its head is still displayed on our bookshelf), and TV nights (namely, Desperate Housewife Tuesdays). My six Irish course mates have also become good friends. Now that classes have ended for the year, we’ve been scheduling the odd tea/coffee outings to keep in touch.

Another blessing has been the frequent interactions with the other Mitchell scholars. I love every member of our Mitchell class and I’ve felt incredibly honored and humbled throughout the year to be a part of the group of people selected by the U.S. Ireland Alliance to participate in the program this year. Just last week we had our last official Mitchell event in Limerick and Dingle, and I had an amazing time relaxing with everyone and simply enjoying their company. Although Glenstal Abbey in Limerick was beautiful and the town of Dingle was incredibly fun, the highlight of the week was getting to talk to everyone a little bit more before we go our separate ways. I truly hope I will have the opportunity to spend time with each of them again in the future. I am especially thankful for my fellow Mitchell Dubliners: Erin, Brendan, Bernadette, Scot, and Sean for making the year ridiculously fun and unforgettable.

My year in Ireland has been an incredible success on all fronts, more than I could have hoped for. There have been very few days when I haven’t been smiling from ear to ear: I’ve enjoyed my course in Meteorology immensely, I’ve found the Irish culture incredibly endearing and the landscapes breathtaking, and of course, I’ve met some wonderful people who I am honored to call close friends. I look forward to maintaining my trans-Atlantic ties after I leave Ireland and I want to thank all of the program supporters who made this year a possibility.

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June 2008 Reflection

There was a time when, desperately homesick and severely jet-lagged, I sat with Allison and Brendan in a very old pub in Blackrock on our first night in Ireland thinking to myself, ‘This is going to be a long year.’

On that evening as we sat over Guinness and chips, anticipating the start of classes and discussing our hopes and fears, it seemed that I would endure a full year of suffering away from home and out of my comfort zone. The three of us had run around as a unit that first day: finding UCD’s international office, locating photocopiers for important documents, tracking down the embassy’s phone number, and ending up a mile outside of UCD at Tesco attempting to purchase toilet paper and milk while standing dumbfounded at the check-out counter with the realization that you had to pay for plastic grocery bags. Later, Allison somehow determined we should take the number 17 bus to Blackrock and find some food; I appreciated her then more than I can express because I would have just gone to bed hungry if left to my own devices.

Starting over is hard, and that’s what the beginning of the year was for me. I had started over at West Point at 17, then again when I spent the semester at the Naval Academy in 2005, and then I ended up in Ireland surrounded by strangers, not to mention in a country far more different from the US than I had anticipated. On that first day I was not looking forward to the next year—I wondered if I could just go back home, where Wal-Mart existed and things were familiar. I was tired of starting over, and I was tired of strangers.

Luckily, those strangers I was surrounded by didn’t stay strangers for long. It would have been impossible to stay distant from Allison, the energetic girl I lived next door to, whose mission in life seemed to be to run as much as possible, and then love even more. This generous and kind woman I share a wall with made the year far easier than I imagined it could be with her warmth, vigor, and strength. Brendan was always there with his cool calmness and varied connections in Ireland and made sure life never became boring.

Later, the other Mitchells would arrive in Ireland and complete our hilarious roster of personalities: Bernadette, the sweet, compassionate girl on whom you could always depend; Scot with his love for adventure and quirky kindheartedness; Sean, to whom everyone goes for advice, a laugh, and the TV channels with American football; Jeff, the ever-talented and determined man who calmly accepted everyone’s idiosyncrasies; Jimmy who loves knowledge so very much and has the anchored ambition of a compelling future leader; Arthur who is our leader, our go-to man, who has the sought after ability to bring people together; Sarah, whose vibrant personality and incredible humor and intelligence kept us all on our toes; Frank, the most careful thinker and wisest twenty-something that I have ever me; Nate, so determined to save the world and doing so with a smile. I have learned plenty in my classes at UCD and ever more during my internship with the National Museum of Ireland and I appreciate the opportunities that I have had to learn and develop both academically and practically in the field of museum studies and cultural policy. But it wasn’t until our final Mitchell trip to Limerick and Dingle that I realized one thing I had neglected to acknowledge over this year that I had spent so much time dreading.

As we drove along with Mary Lou and Trina along a narrow and winding road towards Mount Brandon, surrounded on either side by bright green fields and sheep, the bus became quiet for just a moment. It was then that I realized the Mitchell Scholarship is not properly advertised. It is not simply a fully-paid scholarship to a university in Ireland. It does not simply cover room, tuition, and travel. You don’t leave Ireland with only a master’s degree and a fully stamped passport. The Mitchell Scholarship comes with hidden benefits—11 lifelong friends and enough memories to keep you smiling into very old age.

To all the benefactors of the US-Ireland Alliance, to everyone who has welcomed us into their homes and businesses, and everyone who has spent time making this year possible, particularly Mary Lou and Trina, thank you. I know enough to admit that I haven’t fully realized all the lessons of this Irish journey, but I am confident that I those lessons will reveal themselves to me as I continue with life. So thank you—particularly to those 11 friends who made this year not so long.

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June 2008 Reflection

Well, our year as a Mitchell class is slowly drawing to a close. Some of us have already moved on, the rest sticking around to finish work on final projects. I actually left Ireland yesterday and am writing this from a guesthouse in Johannesburg, South Africa. I’m headed back to Swaziland to do some research on HIV prevention and the local policy making decisions that allocate resources and effort to that end. I’ll be around for a month doing interviews and trying to get a sense of how things have changed over the last year. I’m looking forward to catching up with old friends as well. I lived in Swaziland for the two years prior to the Mitchell experience, and my year in Dublin was a good time to step back and fill in some of my academic gaps with the structure of a formal programme. Being in the Development Studies school at University College Dublin (UCD) gave me a fair amount of freedom in terms of the details of my study, given the interdisciplinary nature of the programme and the breadth of topics addressed.

Mostly, though, the year provided exposure to great people. As I write this I’m sitting across from a German friend of mine from UCD who is in South Africa for the next couple of months doing thesis research on corporate social responsibility. I’ve got colleagues going to East Timor, northern Uganda and India for the next few months. They were a great set of minds to spend time with, have a pint with, and share ideas and experiences. And those experiences come from a wide variety of contexts: The development programme had students from France, Germany, Netherlands, United Kingdom, United States, South Korea, Uganda, Zambia, Ethiopia, and, of course, Ireland.

In addition to my phenomenal classmates, I had the opportunity to get to know an impressive class of Mitchell Scholars. Since my last journal we had two events that gave us an opportunity to get together — the 10th Anniversary of the Good Friday Peace Accords, in Belfast, and our end of year class trip in Co. Kerry. The Belfast event was certainly a highlight of the year. It was inspiring to get a chance to see and hear about the peace process from the historic giants that created the agreement, and we had the sobering experience of hearing from some of the former combatants, from all sides, that have been tasked with implementing the peace. As all involved made clear: the peace process really only begins after the “peace process” has ended at the negotiating table.

But the weekend wasn’t all based on somber reflection, either. There was plenty of good craic, and the US-Ireland Alliance brought together Mitchell Alumni from every year (and nearly all of them). It was great to meet our counterparts from previous years, and while the programme is still young, the number of alumni that gathered in Belfast this past April is a testament to the great experience people had as scholars. And the speed that a sense of community has developed around Mitchell alumni can only be credited to the hard work of people like Trina Vargo and Mary Lou Hartman.

Besides the event in Belfast, our 2007-2008 class met up in Limerick to do some traveling at the end of the academic year. We did a hike up Mt. Brandon and into the clouds (but no rain, amazingly), watched Munster claim the Heineken Cup Championship, and had lots of opportunity for lazy pints and long conversations. We spent two nights in Limerick and ended our week together in Dingle, which has established itself as my favorite place in Ireland. Mary Lou, Arthur, Jeff and I also took in a hurling match in Portlaoise on our way back to Dublin.

Two weeks ago I was watching the Co. Offaly hurling squad win decisively, and now I’m in southern Africa. It was a great year, and I can hardly believe it’s time to move on. While that is true, it is time to get on to the next thing, I had a great time in Ireland, made life-long friends, and left with a great feeling about the place. I’m sure I haven’t seen the last of Ireland, and I’m sure Ireland isn’t finished playing a role in my life.

PS: I’ve made my way over to Swaziland, and my first weekend here the Swazi national football squad (Sihlangu) beat Togo 2-1 in a World Cup qualifier. I believe this is the first win for Sihlangu in six years, and they beat a Togo squad that features Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor. So, I’ll end a very meandering journal (Portlaoise to Swaziland) on that auspicious note. Thanks again to everyone who made this year possible, especially Mary Lou and Trina at the US-Ireland Alliance. Sln go foill.

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June 2008 Reflection

In my last entry, I expressed my mild dislike for the windy, rainy Irish winters. The seasons have indeed changed, but the breeze is a constant here, and it’s strange now that it’s my favorite part of the warm (though not hot) spring days that are common now. I arrived this past September during an unusually—indeed unprecedented—spell of cold wind and rain that had lasted literally for weeks. Now, as dusk begins around ten in the evening and the sunsets over the cow pastures not far outside my window become more and more dramatic, I seem to, at last, be wearing the khaki shorts that I’ve so longed for. And for all of my past complaints about the weather for the first six or seven months of my stay here, the sunny days that I’m experiencing now may make Ireland the best place on Earth to live during the warm months.

From the date of this writing, I have a little over eight weeks to enjoy these Irish summer days before I head back to the US for law school. The four years of active duty service that I’ve committed to the Army, as a JAG (Judge Advocate General’s Corps) lawyer, will start after law school, and I’m looking forward to the experience when this still-distant era begins. For now, however, I have three or four completely free summers to do whatever I wish (and whatever my budget permits). After that, there’s even the possibility of spending three years elsewhere in Europe (namely, Germany or northern Italy), via the Army, once my active duty service begins.

But this summer, I’m getting as much traveling done as I can, since the wanderlust bug has definitely bitten me bad, and I’m frothing at the mouth to get more stamps on my passport. Perhaps like the old witch-doctor process of getting rid of a tapeworm, the only way I may ever be able to rid myself of my rabid travel obsession is by material denial; in this case being overwhelmed with law school work that will keep me from surfing discount travel websites on a daily basis. I’ve certainly seen a lot this year: Iceland, southern Portugal, Galicia, Andalusia, the Canary Islands, Alpine France, Geneva, Morocco, and a huge portion of Ireland. And I’ll be going a few more places during the summer; next month, I’ll be traveling from Dubrovnik, Croatia through Slovenia and to Hungary and Slovakia. My last name is actually Hungarian, and some of my ancestors came over to Appalachian America a couple of generations ago to work as coal miners, intending only to stay a few years (they were obviously wrong!). So this trip will be partly genealogical; no one has yet been back to the “old country” to see where the family came from, and I’ve got a list of towns in Hungary and Slovenia of which a few members of my dad’s extended family are eagerly awaiting pictures.

Also, and maybe just as moving, I’ll be traveling to Normandy, France, to retrace the final footsteps of a maternal uncle of mine, who, with his 29th Infantry Division, invaded Normandy in June of 1944. He was killed in the hedge battles outside the town of St. Lo, a couple of weeks after the beach invasions, and was buried there for a few years until my family had his body sent back to a family cemetery in Kentucky. He was my age, 23, when he died, and I’ve located the cemetery where he was buried, which is now a German POW cemetery, incidentally. The twist of the whole situation is currently making me consider submitting an article to any interested magazine, if possible. My travel buddy for this trip, a guy from my church who’s become one of my best friends over the past year, is a student from Bavaria whose grandfather fought at one point under the main German general of the battle. So he, a German history student with a better command of English than I have, and me, a freshly commissioned U.S. Army lieutenant, will walk the military history tours together where our relatives fought on opposing sides. I think sometimes we take for granted how far we’ve come, if only through little things like my trip with my friend.

Experiences like these have characterized my year here, and any longwinded, philosophical reflection that I can attempt to make about them will only detract from their poignancy. But maybe, as I end my final reflection for this year, the best testament to the lasting bonds that I’ve made here is the very fact that I’m not leaving Maynooth until I absolutely have to; indeed, an alarming ten days before I start my law school orientation in a city to which I still need to move all of my possessions. I want it this way; I want to be involved in Maynooth’s community, whether directing music at church (as I’m doing next Sunday), chatting with my book-club, teaching piano lessons (I have four students now), engaging with the academic-types at the university or just having great conversations at the pub, as long as I can make my experience last. And the weather is great, too, for now.

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June 2008 Reflection

Over the past two months, spring and summer have come, and the once-elusive sun has returned. Endless fields of wildflowers have begun to bloom on the Mourne and Wicklow Mountains. Droves of summer tourists have begun to filter into Dublin by the bus load and the bustling area of city centre where I live seems to be bursting at its seams. During the past two months, I have spent many days eating cheese chips on the lawn in front of the Pav (Trinity’s campus pub) in the sunshine. With the beautiful weather, it has been more and more difficult to stay indoors, but as the end of the year approaches, my time has become busier and busier. At the end of April, all of the Mitchell Scholars met up for the second time this year. We heard Irish political leaders talk about the Good Friday Agreement. Northern Ireland has come a long way in the past ten years, but we also learned about the work that still needs to be done. As part of the commemoration of the Belfast Agreement, we heard Duke Special. I will always remember the evening as one of the highlights of my year. Last weekend we met up on the Dingle Peninsula for our last Mitchell meeting of the year. We hiked Mount Brandon, the second-highest peak in Ireland, and I learned how to make nettle soup and soda bread. Although it was the last time I will likely see all of the Mitchell Scholars together in Ireland, I am positive I will see all of them again soon, wherever or whenever our paths cross again.

I am sad that much of my year in Ireland is over, but I look forward to the month ahead. In a little over two weeks, I will be on a plane to Istanbul with one of my best friends in Dublin. Afterward, I am off to Killarney National Park for a weekend to hike and enjoy the beauty of the mountains. My dad comes to visit a few days later: we will meet in London, travel across the UK by train, and drive through the Scottish Highlands. After all of this, I will have to pack my suitcases, and even then, I do not think I will feel ready to leave.

I will always remember my year in Ireland. I have formed some of my best memories here: the Sunday farmer’s market and sea cliffs in Howth, the views across the Irish sea from the peaks of the Mourne Mountains, the elaborate dinners that I (attempted) to cook for friends in my apartment, and the sizable percentage of my living stipend that has gone to subsidize Guinness at Hogan’s pub.

During the past year, I have had more time to explore the things that I love. I started Trinity’s only student environmental group, spent many weekends hiking in the Wicklow and Mourne mountains, and honed in on my whitewater kayaking skills.

When I left Harvard exactly a year ago, I felt happy to have all of the work behind me. I also felt sad to leave all of my best friends that had been with me for four years, and I felt unsure about what life would be like after college. While in Ireland, I have had the freedom to travel, hike, have a pint of Guinness (or two!), and meet a lot of wonderful friends whom I will never forget. At the end of the year, I still don’t know what I will be doing ten years from now or even two years from now, but this uncertainty does not seem to worry me as much any more: I have come away with a sense of confidence and a strong sense of what’s most important to me in the years ahead – I have a renewed passion for the environmental advocacy and research that has been so important to me this year. And no matter where I live or how busy my life becomes, I will always make time to hike in the mountains or to go for a pint with friends.

As I look forward to next year in Berlin, I continue to cram my brain with German nouns and verbs. I still doubt whether I will ever learn to like the Wienerschnitzel. I never thought I would stay in Europe – I loved my time in Europe so much that it is unclear yet when I will leave. I will be in Ireland for another month and a half yet, but then I am off to Germany to work in Berlin on a Robert Bosch fellowship. I dread the day that I have to pack my suitcases, but I know that I will always have amazing memories from my year in Dublin, and I know I will be back many times in the future.

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June 2008 Reflection

I am just over twenty-three years old and my mother still writes me plane-notes. For those of you who never had the experience of being a middle-school aged girl, a plane-note is a note that is snuck into your suitcase or is given to you tightly SWAK (sealed with a kiss), not to be read until you are nestled safely into your airplane seat. While girls ages 11-14 will be flooded with these from their friends before any adventure, no matter what the length of time—I, in my relative maturity, always have one from my mother. She doesn’t know this, but I save them. And now as I head into the final few weeks of my experience in Northern Ireland I refer back to the one she gave me in September. Besides her encouragement to embrace the inevitable ups and downs of my new home and her request I attempt to appreciate dark beer she left me with this Irish prayer: “May the road rise up to greet you; May the wind be always at your back; And may the Lord hold you in the palm of his hand.” Looking back on my year in Belfast, I got all those things and more.

The road rose up to greet me in many forms—though it was not always a smooth ride. Challenges came from school, volunteering, and of course, and being unable to find a rum and diet coke for less than five pounds (Belfast has not yet embraced the wonders of the fountain beverage). While my undergraduate education had me consumed with classes and clubs, my graduate education gave me the freedom to explore Belfast beyond Queens. While a significant portion of my time was spent researching for my dissertation and reading for classes, just as much time was spent volunteering and participating in community groups and discussions. I made friends on weekend residential trainings dealing with the challenges of moving youth away from violence and difficult group behavior. I also relied on my co-workers and fellow volunteers for suggestions on the nightlife and, of course, food. I became a loyal attendee to certain classes at the gym and am friendly with the other participants and staff who have helped me stay trim in my attempts to appreciate dark beer and addiction to Bassetts Jelly Babies. Now that the weather has gotten nicer I have been able to take my school work outside and enjoy how the entire city seems to congregate in the Botanical Gardens around the ice cream man come early afternoon. I feel a part of Belfast now—I know the streets, the bars, the people—and thus I can look back and see that have found a road, a path, that is my own here.

I did not spend my entire Mitchell experience here in Belfast. The wind has certainly been at my back. I have traveled around Northern Ireland and Ireland taking in the beautiful scenery (though often from a comfortable distance as I have never been a real nature girl) and the friendly people. I have also been able to travel around the world. As previous journal entries have described, I was able to travel to the United Arab Emirates and Tunisia. My friends in Belfast and I also escaped the winter blues with a trip to Barcelona where we embraced sunlight for the first time in months. I was also able to spend spring break with two of my fellow Mitchell Scholars on a ten day, five country trip around Eastern Europe (yes, we are still speaking to each other). While my friends in America were hunched over law school books and working nine to five desk jobs I was enjoying mint tea in a Tunisian market, seeing Picasso’s artwork in Spain and eating the best pastry imaginable while watching Hungarian folk dancers in Budapest. This year has also ensured that the wind will always be at my back. While I have always had a passion for travel and world affairs, this year has given me the independence and drive to know seeing the world is always a possibility. I have been lucky to have friends to travel with me, and luckier to be based in Belfast with Frank, who took coping with my, um, unique personality in stride. Yet, I have also learned to enjoy discovering the world on my own. I have been able to embrace travels and experiences that I want to do with myself as company—a skill that has allowed me to meet the people I have and take the chances I took that made this year as fulfilling as it was.

I believe the aspect of the prayer that refers to the Lord holding someone in the palm of His hand means the individual has the satisfaction of knowing they are in a good place. Taking this year to study in Belfast has been a unique experience. Anyone who has visited or lived in Belfast knows that you have to approach it with a special sense of humor. The concept of punctuality is considered as outdated as chivalry, while the fashions we consider the mistakes of the eighties dominate the teenage club scene. There is no excuse for skipping tea time or choosing an apple over a biscuit, and Harp (a brand of beer) is believed to have medicinal qualities. Yet, it does not take long in Belfast to feel like you are in a good place. The friends I have made here are some of the most wonderful people I have ever known, and even though I have embraced facing the world on my own I have never once been alone here. I been challenged academically and have adjusted slowly to the local jargon– now understanding that a ‘wee’ thing is not always a small request and that ‘your man’ has nothing to do with a guy I know. I have replaced the rum and diet with whiskey on the rocks. I learned to cook potatoes and that mayonnaise goes well with everything. In the same vein, I have mastered the cruel cardio move that is ‘the burpee.’ I have learned to live in Belfast, and despite its quirks, to know that it is a really good place.

So as I prepare to return to the United States I will leave behind the friends and community I have learned to love and laugh with, and I will bring with me memories and experiences we had. I want to thank Mary Lou Hartman and Trina Vargo for, in a moment of temporary insanity, selecting me for this incredible experience and supporting me throughout the year. I would also like to thank the donors to the Mitchell program because without your relationship with us we could not develop this special, unbreakable relationship with Ireland and Northern Ireland. Amidst my travel books, academic books, volunteer manuals, souvenirs and Jelly Babies, my luggage will also contain my mother’s plane note to remind me that this year had its ups and downs and while I still cannot stand dark beer— I got the answer to her prayers.

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June 2008 Reflection

On my desk in Belfast, I keep a photograph of my students from my first year teaching. It’s filled with all the imperfections that usually accompany these types of pictures. Some kids are looking in the wrong direction; some have their eyes closed. And a few look like they want to kill the cameraman.

But for me, it’s my own imperfections that stand out. Not my long, unkempt hair or the fact that I forgot a tie on picture day. Rather, I see the bigger mistakes I made that year. The things I could have taught but failed to; the minutes wasted because of my own inexperience.

This year, that picture has kept me focused. It constantly reminds me that I came to Ireland for a purpose. I wanted to learn more about how to improve my country and about how to make lives, like my kids’, better.

With these goals in mind, I thought I would emerge with a definitive life plan. That I would end the year saying, “I want to be a lawyer.” “I want to be an activist.” “I want to be a teacher or professor.” But I haven’t.

Instead, my experiences in Ireland have given me something more. They’ve given me greater perspective and purpose for making decisions about my future. My classes at Queen’s and my work at the PPR Project have both reinforced my belief that the most ignored deserve a voice. And that without that voice being heard, we all lose out.

Classes at Queen’s have finished, only to be replaced by thesis writing in libraries and coffee shops. Volunteering at PPR will soon be swapped for working there as an employee. And in Limerick and Dingle, our last organized Mitchell event ended with a lively discussion about the future and staying in touch.

It makes me incredibly thankful to know that as we start these new beginnings, I’ve grown as a person. Although I feel less certain of what I will do, I feel much more confident to face that uncertainty well.

As always, thank you to the donors and to Trina and Mary Lou who have all made this year possible. I will be in your debts forever.

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June 2008 Reflection

Every child has drawn cards for their doting parents. We’ve set up our own private Hallmark studio with eight “washable” Crayola markers (in case the inks get on our clothes), a piece of paper from the printer at Dad’s office, and our purest intentions. There have undoubtedly been failures, like Mom’s Birthday 1995 when I made an ill-advised attempt to create a narrative around Garfield the Cat. On the other hand, my parents still keep certain cards they’ve really appreciated, like Father’s Day 2000 when I likened my father to a tried-and-true favorite shirt.

We have all drawn cards. I just never stopped. Over the years, they have become more sophisticated, branching away from cartoon characters or the default flower vase. I now enjoy the process of illustrating an inside joke only the receiver and I can laugh about. Or conjuring up an almost forgotten conversational detail. Better yet, recreating a memorable scene that only a certain few were privy to, e.g. candy bar theft in Dublin or a quasi-hostage situation in Limerick.

So this weekend, I sat down to create the newest batch of thank you cards, this time for the Mitchell year-end trip to Limerick and Dingle. A depiction of the best afternoon tea I think I’ve ever had adorns the cover of the card on its way to Glenstal Abbey. A trifecta of signature instruments symbolizes the O’Suilleabhain family band. As I looked at the growing pile of thank you cards, I began to reflect on how many people have contributed to my Mitchell experience this year.

In the fall, I bought a 50-pack of blank cards and envelopes, never expecting to go through all of them. I haven’t yet, but if I made a card for each and every person deserving of a simple thank you, fifty would not be enough. This year has included a range of memories from the unforgettable Belfast event (my parents gushed about my photograph with Senator Mitchell) to the smaller everyday event. As a final journal entry, I thought I’d describe some of the cards I would make for the people who may not be on the list of obvious thank you recipients.

As anyone who has talked to me about Cork knows, one of my favorite parts of the city is the English Market. For the Korean ladies at Superfruit, I would paint a card with three Rocha pears because no matter what other produce I may get, I always pick up three pears near the checkout counter. For The Chicken Inn, I might include a list of “Greatest Hits” of chicken dishes I’ve miraculously learned how to cook (albeit with the help of my mom’s care package of Chinese sauces). And I’d have to paint a Black Forest cake for the Old Mill Confectionary, which makes the best in town.

For the owners of the pub Sin …, I’d paint a card with fiddles and spoons to mark the many times I’ve gone for a pint and a trad session. Maybe they’ll attach it to the ceiling to join the other various mementos ranging from vintage Cork Film Festival Posters to California postcards. For Mr. and Mrs. Song at the Jia Jia Market, a simple bowl of rice to represent the many creature comforts I’ve bought from their store will express my gratitude to them. I’d have to paint a depiction of Ireland’s maligned Dustin the Turkey for tennis partner-turned-Eurovision fan Thomas. For my friends at Nasc, the immigrant support center, I’d paint a likeliness of Michael, the Burmese Santa Claus at our Christmas Party.

I’d have a field day coming up with ideas for my UCC colleagues. A cup of mulled wine from the potluck Mary Rose hosted for my class. A hurley and sliotar for Catherine, who tried in vain to get me to take up the sport (and after finally seeing a match this weekend, I’ve reconsidered her seemingly altruistic motives). And for Dave, a surfboard to thank him for taking this California boy for his first surfing lesson in Tralee Bay.

And yet, I still need to highlight a few obvious thank yous. Of course, there are my fellow Mitchell Scholars, for whom I’ve been brainstorming cards since our orientation way back in September. And I cannot say thank you enough to Trina, Mary Lou, and Paul Hayes for everything. But those card ideas will stay a secret for now.

The way I see it, a card is not so much a way to merely recognize the person I’m giving it to; it’s a way to recognize the distinct relationship we have together. Maybe that relationship only involves a single memory or a single object, but that does not make it any less significant.

Pablo Picasso once said, “It took me four years to paint like Raphael, but a lifetime to paint like a child.” Henri Matisse echoed the statement, yearning for the freshness with which children see the world. And so the cards remain. For me, Ireland and this year have meant a chance to see the world anew. To meet new people and to meet a new self. To cast aside old shoulder chips and to interact with others on a purely human level. While I may not have caught the names of all those who have mattered to me this year, I will take the tell-tale images – the spoons, scones, and surfboards – with me to the next stage.

During my exit interview, Mary Lou asked me if I had set and met any goals for this year. I said I had not succeeded in starting and completing a creative project. I think I answered too quickly. Sure, that screenplay has not written itself, but I look at these cards and the ones I have yet to make. They symbolize for me memories created, which all contribute to the new self I am excited to take back to the States. And for this, especially to all the supporters of the US-Ireland Alliance, I say thank you.

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